The Doctor and Rose Tyler
by whololly
Summary: Read and you'll find out, if you dare.


"Good morning, Doctor" Rose said cheerfully as she walked into the console room. The Doctor was in there, tinkering with the TARDIS as usual.

"Hello," He said. "how'd you sleep?"

"Good actually, thanks for asking."

"Fancy breakfast?"

"Don't mind if I do. Are you coming with?" Rose asked while looking at him.

He wasn't hard on the eye, he really wasn't. Brown eyes that were so old, but could look so intense and sweet, brown hair standing up in all directions. He always wore his brown pinstriped suit with a tie and his red chucks. He was tall and slim but he could pull it off. Rose's string of thoughts was abruptly broken when the Doctor spoke.

"Nah, I already ate."

"Oh, okay." Rose sounded slightly disappointed but the Doctor didn't notice. He turned back to the TARDIS and started tinkering again. Rose left the room without saying anything else.

Later, Rose sat at the kitchen table, eating some kind of fruity cereal the TARDIS had picked out for her, when she heard a loud bang from out the console room, followed by a string of curses from the Doctor. Quickly she ran towards the noise. When she arrived in the console room she saw the Doctor sitting against the wall with his hand against his forehead.

"Doctor, what happened!?" She asked while rushing towards him.

"I don't really remember." He said vaguely, letting out a pained groan as he rubbed his temples.

"Okay, just come with me, we'll get some ice for your head."

They sat in the med bay, Rose gently pressing an ice pack to the clumsy man's forehead.

"How are you feeling?" She asked him gently. The Doctor could hear the genuine concern in her voice.

"I'm better, thank you, you're very sweet." He told her with a bit of a smile, looking up at her face, staring at her for a moment. "One question though: how'd you get inside the TARDIS exactly?"

Rose took a few steps back and looked at the Doctor. He wasn't joking about this, he'd never joke about such a thing. He couldn't remember who she was.

"It- it's me, Rose. I've been travelling with you for some time now. Don't you remember me?"

"I'm afraid not, Rose. The bump on my head must have caused some sort of memory loss, I suppose. How interesting, that has never happened before." He looked almost intrigued, and definitely distracted from the situation they were in.

"But your memories will come back, right?" Rose asked him, not liking it at all.

The Doctor looked up, snapped out of his thoughts, and smiled at the pink-and-yellow girl, wriggling his eyebrows.

"In a few days I'll be back to normal." He assured her with a nod. "In the meantime, maybe you could tell me some things about yourself and about what we did?"

"Yes, of course." She nodded quickly, smiling her usual smile and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Well I'm Rose, Rose Tyler, I used to live in London but we met some time ago. You blew up my work, then asked me to come with you twice." She started, chuckling fondly at the memory.

"Twice? I never ask anyone twice." He commented, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Well you asked me twice. The first time you said that I could come with you in your spaceship I said no because I had to take care of Mickey-the-idiot, that's what you call him anyway. So you left but a few seconds later you returned and said that she could also travel in time. I couldn't say no to that, right?"

"Certainly not! And your work was probably not very interesting if I blew it up." He grinned. "Where did I take you?"

"You took me to the end of the world. Well, of the Earth."

"I took you THERE on a first trip? Nice way to make you stay!"

"Well, you took me for chips afterwards." Rose laughed.

They talked about other adventures that they had experienced. The Doctor liked Rose. he could understand why he'd asked her twice. There was something special about her. Something familiar.

"And we've been best friend ever since." Rose ended her story.

"Rose?" The Doctor asked her after a moment.

"Yah, what's up?"

"We are best friends, right? Well, are you sure we aren't supposed to be more?" The Doctor didn't look at Rose. Instead, he looked at the floor.

"Well," she started. "We flirt occasionally, but that's just friendly. Nothing serious has ever happened. Why do you ask?"

With those words, the Doctor dove forwards to Rose and kissed her on her lips, which made her freeze in return. She wanted it, of course she did, but it just felt wrong. He didn't remember anything about her, anything they'd been through. She pulled away from him at the thought.

"I-I'm sorry, Rose." He said, looking at her shocked face.

"It's okay. This is going to sound confusing but-." She stopped for a second, looking at the Doctor. He really looked sorry. "You don't remember me, what if you remember kissing me and regret it?"

"Rose, believe me, I'm not going to regret it." With that, he leaned in to kiss her again, but instead of feeling her lips, his lips pressed against her cheek. Well, that wasn't what he'd expected.

"I'm sorry, I- I can't." She said, swallowing thickly and running off into the corridor.

Rose was in the mind room. It was a big, round space with one big, comfortable fauteuil in the middle. The walls changed colour from time to time, depending on the mood of the TARDIS. It was the perfect room to talk to her.

"This is wrong!" Rose stated. "But why do I want this so much too?"

The TARDIS gave a comforting hum and the walls turned red.

"Of course I like him! He's my best friend ad he saved my life so many times. I'm just confused. He doesn't even remember me!"

The walls went from red to a comforting blue and Rose could feel herself calm down.

"I know, it'll be just a few more days and he will have his memory back. I hope he doesn't remember any of this."

The TARDIS hummed as if she agreed.

"I guess I'll just go looking for him then, trying to get him to remember sooner."

Rose left the mind room, not noticing the walls of the TARDIS changing to a deep burgundy. The colour that indicated love.

"Doctor, where are you?" Rose shouted through the hallways.

"Over here, in the library!" She heard ahim respond. She walked towards the library and stood in the door opening. The Doctor was lying on the sofa with a book in his hand. The title stated 'Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire'.

"Just reading your favourite." He stated, glancing up from the book to look at her.

"Oh, I thought we could- wait, did you say MY favourite? How do you know that?"

"You told me, remember? We were sitting in this room reading books and you said 'Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire' is my favourite book ever!'" the Doctor told her, trying to copy Roses voice but failing miserably.

"You remember that?" she said, looking shocked.

"Of course I do! I remember everything we ever did together," He pointed at his head. "Big Time Lord-y Brain remember?"

"Oh Doctor you remember again!" She ran over to him and gave him a big hug, which he returned, though he was slightly confused.

"Remember what?" He asked.

"You don't remember?"

"Remember what?" the Doctor asked her. What on Gallifrey was she talking about?

"That you suffered from memory loss the last few days?"

"I did?"

"Yeah, but it's okay, you remember again!" She hugged him again.

He thanked Rassilon for being a good actor. Of course he remembered everything that happened the past few days, but it was better to pretend that he didn't. That way the embarrassment of the kiss, well kisses, wouldn't come up as a conversation topic.

"Anything happen?" He asked, curious about whether or not she would mention the lip smacking.

"Uh," She hesitated for a second. "No, nothing important, just tried to explain who I was and all the adventures we went on."

The Doctor felt relieved but disappointed at the same time. Did she really think their kisses weren't important, or was she too embarrassed to tell him about them.

"I didn't remember who you were?" He tried to sound surprised. "Oh Rose, I'm so sorry if I hurt you!" He pulled her into another hug.

"It's okay, you weren't yourself, it wasn't your fault."

That was his Rose, always forgiving, never blaming him for anything.

"Thank you, Rose."

"For what?"

"For everything." He hugged her a little tighter.

"So, I see that I was fixing the TARDIS before I- you know- lost it?" He stated. "I'll get back to that then."

"Can I go exploring the TARDIS?" she asked.

"Sure, just don't get lost like the last time, took me three hours to find you! Don't go too far."

Rose already left; she lifted her hand to wave him off.

Rose had seen so many rooms since she started exploring and, quite frankly, she was lost. She wasn't going to admit it though. She wasn't going to give the Doctor that kind of satisfaction. She opened another door and stepped inside. She felt the soft grass underneath het bare feet. The grass was a deep red colour and matched the orange sky perfectly. There were two suns in the sky, one in the east and one in the south. The trees were a silver colour, glittering in the sunlight. It was beautiful. Rose lied down on the grass and relaxed instantly, just enjoying the peace of the room.

After a few hours had passed, the sky in the room started to turn a purplish colour, which looked amazing. Rose decided it was time to get back to the Doctor before he would start to worry. It took her another half hour to find him.

"You were lost, weren't you?" He had a cheesy grin on his face.

"No!" She stated. "I found this amazing room, red grass, orange sky with two suns and silver trees that glitter beautiful in the sunlight. Do you know what room I'm talking about?"

"No, never heard of it." He said. He sounded quite cold and uncaring.

"Oh, maybe I can show it to you?"

"No, thanks."

Rose left for the kitchen. She was pretty confused by his attitude. She told him about the most beautiful place she'd ever seen and he didn't even care. Well, he'd seen so many things, it probably wasn't personal. She fixed herself something to eat.

The truth was that the Doctor knew exactly which room Rose had talked about. The red grass, the orange sky, the silver trees, She'd found the Gallifrey room. The room was an exact replica of what Gallifrey used to look like. He never went to the room himself, because every time he would look inside, he only saw the destruction of his home. He only saw the Time War ripping everything apart.

The Doctor went to the kitchen and saw Rose.

"Hello m'lady, what are you eating?" he sounded cheerful again, Rose noted.

"Just some chips the TARDIS made, want some?"

"Don't mind I do." The Doctor said, sitting down next to Rose and shoving one of the chips in his mouth.

"Done exploring?" He asked.

"For today. I'll probably continue tomorrow if the TARDIS still can't go anywhere."

"I'm afraid not." He stated. "Probably another day or so. Do you mind?"

"No, not at all, gives me time to get to know the TARDIS better."

She sighed. How could the Doctor be so uncaring at one moment, but be so bubbly and happy the other. She'd probably never know.

"You look tired." He noticed.

"Thanks, every girl loves to hear that." She said, sarcastically.

"No, no, no, no, no, you look beautiful as always, you just look beautiful and tired."

"Oh, well thanks for real then. I guess I am tired. I'll go off to bed then. Goodnight Doctor." She gave him a little peck on the cheek and left the room.

Did she just kiss him? He thought. Well, it was only a peck, but it still counted as a kiss, Right? He ate the rest of the chips and went back to the console room to continue the tinkering.

Rose was in the bathroom and took a shower. She was singing. Normally the Doctor couldn't hear the sound but for some reason he could tonight. Like the TARDIS carried the sound to the console room. Rose had a beautiful singing voice, so he listened.

 _From here to the moon and back._

 _Who else in this world would love you like that?_

 _Love everlasting, I promise you that._

 _From here to the moon and back._

 _From here to the moon and back._

The Doctor loved her voice, but something about the song seemed familiar. Could it be about him? No, probably not. But why would the TARDIS let him hear it? It confused him, though, and the thoughts kept haunting him in the back of hs mind. After a while the singing stopped and he heard the door open. Rose walked into the console room. She was wearing pyjamas and no make-up. She looked beautiful.

"I thought you were going to bed?" He asked her.

"I was, and I thought that door lead to my room. Guess I got a little confused." She looked a little blurry.

"Come here, I'll help you." The Doctor stated and he slipped his arm around her waist to support her.

"You're just very tired; you'll be okay after you sleep."

He brought her to her bedroom and tucked her into bed.

"You have a beautiful singing voice by the way." He said.

"You heard me sing? I'm sorry, I'll keep it down next time."

"It's okay, for some reason the TARDIS carried the sound to the console room. I wasn't supposed to hear it. Normally the walls are sound proof."

"Okay," She whispered, snuggling up on her bed. "Goodnight Doctor."

"Goodnight Rose."

The Doctor left the room.

"You are so sneaky, you know? He wasn't supposed to hear that!" Rose whispered to the TARDIS. She hummed softly in return.

"Not funny, what if he suspects the song is about him? I don't want him to know that it was about him!"

The TARDIS hummed again.

"Thanks. It's okay, I forgive you."

Rose went to sleep.

Everyaay for the next couple of days, Rose went to the room she liked to call 'the Garden room'. With that she meant the room the Doctor knew as 'the Gallifrey room. She loved the place, although every time she told the Doctor about it, he would act uncaring or change the subject. She thought it was weird, it was his TARDIS, how could he not know the most beautiful room she housed? She tried not to question it too much. Rose would lie down on the grass and sing the song about the Doctor to herself, hoping the TARDIS wouldn't carry the sound to him again. Occasionally, she did it anyways. The Doctor would hear the beautiful sound of Rose's voice and listen to it until it stopped. He still wondered if the song was meant for someone in particular. He decided he wanted to know.

The Doctor and Rose were sitting in the kitchen, laughing about something he had said. It involved bananas and a Fez. The Doctor finally stopped laughing and looked at Rose. She looked beautiful when she laughed and it was his favourite sound in the world, next to her singing of course.

"Rose?" He eventually asked.

"Yeah Doctor?"

"Who is that song about?"

"The song? Did the TARDIS carry the sound through again?"

"Yeah," He smiled. "But it's a beautiful song, who's it about?"

Rose was silent for a second. Should she tell him that it was about him? She quickly retraced the lyrics in her head. No! Better not tell him. She thought. It states her love for him multiple times, and she did. She loved the Doctor. Unfortunately she expected that he didn't return the feeling so she decided not to tell him.

"Uh, it's not really about someone. I guess my mum used to sing it to me. You know, when she still was alive. I sung it at her funeral." Rose appeared sad.

"I'm sorry, Rose. About your mother's passing." He said softly while getting a hold of her hand.

"It's okay Doctor. It's not like it's your fault."

"So the song is about your mum then?" he asked.

"No, she always told me that, when I found someone, I should sing it to him to show him how much I love him. I don't know, it has been stuck in my head for the last few days." She shrugged her shoulders.

The Doctor was surprised. Normally when Rose was talking about her mother, she would start to cry and he had to calm her down, but she seemed very calm.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "Normally you would be in tears right now."

"I'm fine, I guess the garden room has a calming effect on me."

"The garden room?" He questioned,

"Yeah, red grass, orange sky, silver trees that shine in the sunlight. Remember?"

"Oh, that one." He said, sounding cold like he always did when the subject moved to that particular room.

"Doctor, don't you like that room?" Rose asked.

"Why would you say that?"

"Well, I know you said that you didn't know it but I know that's a lie because you know every single room on the TARDIS. You said so yourself. But every time I bring up that particular room, you get so distant. What is it about that room that you hate?"

"I don't hate it, it's just-," the Doctor was quite for a few moments. "Come with me." He said, getting a hold of Rose's hand and pulling her off the sofa.

"Where to?" She asked, having to jog to keep up with him.

He didn't reply.

They walked for a few minutes and stopped in front of the door to the Gallifrey room/Garden room. He let go of her hand and opened the door. They stepped inside.

"How can you hate this?" Rose questioned him. "It's the most beautiful place I've ever seen."

"Rose, when I look at this room, I see something-," he took a minute to find the right words. "I see something different than what you see. I know it's a beautiful room to you, but not to me."

"Then tell me what you see." She said. She looked at him, but he didn't return her gaze. He just stood there, eyes closed, not saying anything.

"Please Doctor, let me see what you see."

"You don't want to see this. Once you have seen it, you can never un-see it, you will have to live with the image printed into your memory. Do you really want that?"

"I do if it means I will understand you. Don't you get that you are way more important than a room, even if it is so beautiful. I care about YOU, Doctor."

He opened his eyes and looked at her. She was so small, yet so brave and kind and caring that she would face the most horrible things, just to help him.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Alright then."

He took her hand and made her close her eyes. He did something and Rose felt something that felt a lot like a small itch inside her head.

"Okay, open your eyes." He said.

Rose opened her eyes and couldn't believe what she saw, or what she didn't see. The beautiful red grass was replaced by black sand, no, it was ash. The sky was grey with clouds and smoke and there were no bright suns to be seen. The silver trees were gone and replaced by hundreds and hundreds of dead bodies. They wore a kind of red cloak and hat. Most of their clothes were stained with blood. Up further ahead there was a fight happening. One of the men in red cloaks was shooting at a Dalek. It shot back and the man fell down, dead. It was an awful sight and Rose felt a hand slipping into hers. It was the Doctor, trying to comfort her.

"What is this...?" She asked in terror. "This is terrible!"

"It's Gallifrey. What you first saw was Gallifrey before the Last Great Time War. It was beautiful, really. I used to play in the red grass field under the light of the orange twin suns. But then the war started. Everybody was murdered by the Daleks. And now I'm all alone."

They were both silent for a moment, until Rose dared to speak again.

"Well, I know it's not the same," She started. "But I'm here."

The Doctor looked at her and gave her a sad smile.

"You, Rose Tyler, are everything I need."

She smiled at her slightly.

"Can I try something?" she asked.

"Of course, what are you going to do?"

"Just trust me on this one, okay?"

He nodded.

"Close your eyes."

He closed his eyes and felt Rose's hand on his temples.

Rose concentrated on her memories of the beautiful place that used to be Gallifrey.

Then The Doctor gave a slight moan: He felt a slight pain in his brain, just behind his eyes.

"Open them and tell me what you see." Rose said, removing her hands and stepping back.

The Doctor opened his eyes and stood in silence for a moment. Rose could see his eyes starting to tear up.

"What did you do?" He asked her, looking at her with a hint of disbelief in his eyes.

"While you were tinkering with the TARDIS, I read a book about brain activity and how you can sometimes change what another person sees when he or she looks at a certain place. I didn't know if it would work on Time Lords, you know, with your big brains and super biology, but it was worth a shot. I concentrated on my memory of how Gallifrey used to be and transferred it to you, taking away the horrible sight of this room. You of course will remember how the war was, but at least you won't see that image in this room. Al least if it worked." She stated.

The Doctor looked back at the room and smiled, because it definitely had worked. When he looked at the room he no longer saw war and dead Time Lords, he saw the red grass again, the orange sky with the twin suns and the silver trees glittering in the sunlight. Finally he could see Gallifrey again as it was intended. He saw it in the way it looked when he'd called it home. Rose had given him back this little piece of his home.

"Rose, I-." He didn't know what to say.

"It's okay, she said. "I'm just glad I could help."

"Help?" He yelled. "Rose, you did so much more than 'help'. You gave me back a little piece of home!" His eyes started to tear up and he swept Rose up in his arms, twirling her around and hugging her tightly. "I can never thank you enough for this, you truly are fantastic, brilliant, AMAZING!"

Rose felt really good about herself for once. The fact that the Doctor was happier than she'd ever seen him made her happy too. It was a pity though that she didn't remember what the room used to look like. She now only saw destruction and death. But the Doctor was happy so it would be selfish to spoil the mood.

The Doctor lay down on the grass and looked up at the sky.

"Rose! Join me!" He yelled happily, grinning up at her.

"No thanks, I'll make us something to eat. Transferring sights really takes it out of you." She joked and she left the room.

Why would you leave this beautiful place to get something to eat? He thought, and then it hit him: Rose couldn't see the beauty of Gallifrey anymore. She'd given that to him and took his memories of the room being all about death and war and destruction. And she didn't even let him know that she didn't see it anymore. That's how kind and selfless she was! And those were two of the million things about Rose that he loved.

"God Rose, I love you so much!" He murmured to himself.

Rose was very tired, so she went to bed. She figured that the Doctor was still in the Gallifrey room, enjoying the things he could finally see again. It was around 3 AM when Rose woke up screaming. She'd dreamed about Gallifrey. About the things she'd now seen. The Daleks, the War, Death. She dreamed about the Doctor having to fight. He stood there, shooting at Daleks and then he would turn to here. She was a distraction and he got shot by a Dalek. He screamed her name and she ran over to him to try and help him but she was too late, he would already be dead and she would hear the cold sound of the Dalek laughing. It would say something. EXTERMINATE! And attempted to shoot her. Then she would wake up screaming.

Rose had no intentions on telling the Doctor about her dreams. He would only feel guilty and that would make her selfish. Or maybe he would get mad at her for telling him, because it would feel like she wished she'd never given him the memory of his home, and he would kick her out. So telling him was a no-go.

Over the next few nights Rose would wake up multiple times every night because of the nightmares about Gallifrey, but her mind was set on not telling the Doctor about them. He had been so happy the last few days and she wouldn't ruin that because of some stupid dreams. Rose had already tried sleeping pills. The remaining ones she would've loved to toss in a supernova or a black hole. Never again. They would trap her in the dream and she would see the Doctor, dying a long and painful death, telling her that it was her fault and that he wished he'd never met her. That night she woke up crying out that she was sorry and she started crying. The dreams looked so real. Fortunately, the TARDIS knew Rose didn't want the Doctor to know, so she kept Rose's room sound proof. Rose was sick of the dreams and waking up over and over again, that she'd given up on sleeping. In the last week she'd only fallen asleep two times. The Doctor didn't notice, spending his time lying in the Gallifrey room or tinkering in the console one. Rose couldn't blame him. He hadn't seen his home like that in many, many years.

Rose was sitting at the kitchen table, trying not to fall asleep by drinking loads of coffee, when the Doctor walked in. On his face Rose saw a big smile like always these days. It meant he'd just visited the Gallifrey room.

"Rose, are you alright?" His smile dropped immediately. "You don't look good."

"Oh, I'm fine," she lied. "Just a little tired, that's all."

"Then drink up that coffee, I thought about taking you to a different time today. How about the '60's? 1969? I hear it is beautiful." He ran to the console and started to pull levers and push buttons. Rose had trouble keeping up with him but she managed to get to the console room without falling. She let herself fall on the captain's chair.

"Okay, July 16, 1969. The moon landing." He stated exited. "Hold onto something, Rose. This is going to be a rough landing."

Rose grabbed the rail behind her but she wasn't strong enough at the moment to hold on. She fell on the floor. As soon as the TARDIS had landed, the Doctor rushed over to her and helped her up.

"Are you sure you're up for this, Rose?" He asked. She could sense the concern in his voice, but there was something else there too. It sounded like disappointment, and if there was one thing Rose hated it was to disappoint the Doctor.

"I'm fine," She said. "Let's go!" She tried to sound enthusiastic and the Doctor bought it.

"Allons-y!" He shouted as he grabbed Rose's hand and dragged her behind him out of the TARDIS.

They found the perfect spot to see the rocket leave the station and sat down. Rose immediately lied down on the soft grass and closed her eyes.

"Are you sure you don't want to sleep? I can wake you up when the launch begins." The Doctor asked Rose.

"No, I'm fine, really."

It was silent for the moment and the Doctor and Rose laid down on the grass looking at the sky. He looked at Rose and saw she indeed had fallen asleep. He laughed and put his coat over her. A few moments later he saw that the girl was shivering. All of the sudden she woke up and screamed. The Doctor pulled her in his embrace, confusion on his face.

"Rose! It's okay, I'm here." He shushed her gently.

Rose tried to stay strong but the Doctor saw her eyes tearing up. He kissed the top of her head. Rose couldn't keep it dry anymore and she started to cry. The Doctor held her in his arms, tightening his embrace.

"Rose, what was your nightmare about?" He asked. "You know you can tell me right?"

"It's just-," Rose hesitated for a second. "It's nothing really, I'm fine."

"Rose, don't lie to me. I know you're not fine. Is it your mother?" He guessed.

"No, they're not about mum."

"Then what are they about?" He asked her. He looked her in the eye but she couldn't meet his gaze and not cry. His eyes were full of compassion and care and she didn't want to ruin the happiness he had felt in the last days. She looked up and saw the Apollo 11 taking off and heading to the moon.

"Look, it's starting." Rose tried to get the Doctor's attention off of her but it didn't work. She could feel his gaze staring at her.

"Rose, don't change the subject." He said.

"It fits my song, though, the moon landing I mean." Rose said, and she started singing.

 _From here to the moon and back._

 _Who else on this world will love you like that._

 _Love everlasting I promise you that._

 _From here to the moon and back,_

 _From here to the moon and back._

The Doctor really did love that song, and especially if Rose sang it. But she tried to take his mind of her nightmare, which didn't work. He wanted to start talking again but Rose cut him off.

"You see, because Neil Armstrong goes from here to the moon and back. Kind of ironic."

"Yes, I guess it is. But don't try to change the subject, what are your dreams about." He asked, this time he cupped her cheek with his hand and looked her in the eye. He saw that Rose's eyes started to tear up again.

"Rose, please tell me. Don't you trust me?" He hated to use this kind of nasty tricks on her but it was the only way how she would tell him what was going on.

"I- I dream about you." She started.

"About me? Rose, what do I do?" He asked.

"Uh, you- you're fighting in the Time War. And you were winning." She hesitated for a moment, looking at the Doctors face. He looked startled.

"Go on Rose, tell me. I want to know. Maybe I can help you."

"Well, you see me standing there and you get distracted, and then the Dalek-. It- It shot you!" She stopped talking and her eyes teared up again. For a second she buried her face in his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"Rose, it isn't real. I'm right here. All alive." He gave her a sad smile. "Does anything else happen after that?"

"Uh, well I run over to you- obviously- and you are dying. I ask you if there is anything I can do." Rose let out a big, sad sigh. "And then you say that it's my fault that you're dying, and that you wished you never met me." She whispered. The Doctor looked at her with big eyes.

"Rose, I'm so sorry. You have to know that those nightmares aren't real. I would never, and I really mean never, blame you for anything! And the day I met you, was the first day since the War that I was happy again! And I've been happy every day since all because of you."She looked at him and gave him a smile. God how much he loved it when she smiled.

"Thank you Doctor, I feel so much better now."

"Anything for you." He smiled at her and gave her a kiss on her forehead.

"Looks like we missed it." She pointed at the moon.

"It's okay, I've already seen it about four times, in other incarnations of course."

Rose looked really tired and was about to fall asleep. The Doctor picked her up, bridal-style, and brought her back to the TARDIS. He put her into bed and tucked her in.

"Go to sleep, Rose. I'll be right outside when you need me."

"Doctor," Rose said, getting a hold of his hand. "Can you- like- can you stay? Please?" She looked at him with her big, brown eyes. He hesitated for a moment but he caved in the end. He smiled at her and took of his jacket and tie. He rolled up his sleeves and lay down next to her on top of the duvet. Rose rested her head on his chest and the sound of his double heartbeat soothed her to sleep in no time. He looked down on her and noted she was sleeping. He thought about if he could slip away and take the TARDIS somewhere, getting some chips for Rose for when she would wake up. He looked down at her again. She looked so peaceful, he couldn't make himself leave. To make sure she wasn't having another nightmare he placed his hand on her temples. He closed his eyes to see what she was dreaming about. He saw himself and Rose laying on the apple grass in New-New York. They were laughing and the Doctor was relieved to see she wasn't having any nightmares anymore. He was about to take his hands of her temples when he caught a piece of the conversation dream-Rose and dream-Doctor were having.

"I'm really glad I met you, you know that right? You know that you are everything to me?" the dream-Doctor said.

"I know, you put it in your vows, if I remember correctly."

"Yes you do, or wedding was beautiful, wasn't it?"

"Yes it was," dream-Rose said. "And the honeymoon, the night the little one was conceived." They both giggled.

What? The Doctor thought. Rose dreams about us being married and herself being pregnant? But that means that she-. He stopped himself, knowing better. Rose didn't love him, she saw them as best friends. This dream was just a subconscious image her brain had created. She'll probably won't remember this when she wakes up. The conversation between the dream-couple went on. The Doctor overheard something about baby names. Hope for a girl and they didn't have one yet for a boy. The Doctor liked the name Hope. Maybe because the name perfectly explained that he was hoping that this dream would, someday, become the truth. And the truth was that he loved Rose very much, and that he would want to marry her, but she didn't feel the same way about him. At least that was what he thought. He removed his hands from her temples and looked at Rose's face. She had a broad smile on her face. The Doctor smiled and slowly fell asleep.

The Doctor was still asleep when Rose woke up. She hadn't had any nightmares. In fact, she'd had the best dream she could think of. They were married, she and the Doctor. And she was pregnant with his child. Rose wished that it wasn't just a dream, but that it was reality. It was a pity the Doctor had such commitment issues. She learned that when she met Sarah-Jane, whom had been dropped back on Earth, when it got inconvenient to bring her. Although the Doctor had told her so many times that he would never let her go, that he would never leave her, sometimes she was scared that he would. Sarah-Jane and he had been so close once, and he dropped her back. But the Doctor knew that he was all she'd got. He was her best and only friend since Mickey was left in the parallel universe with Martha. The last thing Rose had heard was that Mickey and Martha had gotten married and that they had a baby girl named Rose. She'd thought it was so sweet of them to name the baby after her. Her thoughts were interrupted by a small moan of the Doctor. He must have been dreaming. Rose slipped out of his embrace, gave him a small kiss on the cheek and left the room. She went to the kitchen to get some food.

She was eating some kind of fruity cereal the TARDIS had picked out for her when the Doctor walked in.

"Hello sleepy, how'd you sleep?" She asked cheerfully.

"Fine," He murmured while walking towards the fridge. "And you?"

"Fine too, thanks for asking"

The Doctor sat down next to her with a bowl of cereal. Rose hoped for him it tasted better than it looked but she got her answer when the Doctor spit out the bite he'd taken and pulled a nasty face.

"Not so tasty then?" Rose laughed.

"No, what did the TARDIS give you?" He looked in her bowl and saw the fruity cereal.

"My favourite!" He shouted. "Why do you get the good stuff and I have to eat this nasty cereal? I'm not even sure it is cereal."

"She likes me better than you!" Rose laughed. Tears sprung in her eyes.

"Does not!" He shouted.

"Does too"

"Does not"

"Does too"

"Not!"

"Too!"

It was silent for a slight moment and then the both burst out in laughter.

"Rose Marion Tyler, you got it coming." He said and he walked towards her.

"No, please don't! Okay I surrender."

"Too late." He said and he ran towards her. Before she could move away the Doctor had tackled her to the ground and started an intense tickle fight. He knew Rose was very ticklish and Rose had no way to defend herself from him. He had the upper hand.

"Please!" She laughed. "Please stop! You win, you win!"

The Doctor stopped tickling her, got off of her and helped her up on her feet. He had a big grin on his face.

"Ha," He laughed. "I win!"

"You cheated! You are way stronger than me, I had no chance!" She said in defence.

"So now you hope you'll get a rematch? Forget it Tyler, I won fair and square."

"Okay, but this isn't over." Rose tried to sound scary but failed. Soon they were both lying on the floor in laughter again.

"So, where are we going next?" Rose asked him when their laughter finally died down.

"I don't know, there are so many places we could go to."

"what about another trip to New-New York? I liked it there." Rose said.

"You got possessed by Cassandra!" He yelled. "What's likable about that?"

"I don't know, I guess the apple grass was so nice. Can we please go there?"

The Doctor remembered Rose's dream. It had taken place in New-New York. But they weren't married and Rose was unfortunately not pregnant with his child. He stopped himself thinking like that. "It won't happen, Doctor. Don't get your hopes up." He murmured to himself.

"What was that?" Rose asked him.

"Oh, no, nothing. Let's go to New New-York then."

"Thank you Doctor!" Rose said. She walked up to him and gave him a little peck on the cheek.

"Uh, yes, no thanks. Hold on to something."

A few seconds later they arrived in New New-York. Rose stepped out of the TARDIS and ran into the field. She inhaled deep and smelled the apple grass. The Doctor had followed her and he put down his coat like a picknick blanket for them both. He and Rose sat down, just enjoying the silence for a moment. The Doctor looked at Rose. She looked beautiful. He recognized the clothes she was wearing, but what did he recognize them from? And a moment later he realized it was the exact same outfit she was wearing in her dream. Did she plan this or was it a big coincidence? He decided it was probably the latter.

"Were you married on Gallifrey?" Rose asked out of nowhere.

The Doctor sat in silence a little longer before he started to answer.

"Yes, I was." He said.

"How was she?"

"She was-," The Doctor had to think of the right words to say. "She was beautiful and smart and adventurous. She always knew what to say on certain moments."

"You must really miss her." Rose said, looking at the Doctor.

"Yes, I do. Sometimes I think about her, and the children of course."

"You were a dad?" Rose asked in disbelief. She'd always thought of the Doctor as a caring person, but a family man?

"And a grandfather too." He said eventually.

Rose just looked at him. She knew he had many lives before they'd met but never thought of him having kids and grandkids.

"On Gallifrey there were arranged marriages. I loved my wife, I really did. But I was never in love with her. She wasn't in love with me either but we accepted it from each other. I couldn't have imagine myself with anyone else then her at that moment." He said.

"Mickey and I once thought I was pregnant." Rose said.

The Doctor looked at her with a shocked look on his face.

"You were pregnant?" He asked.

"No, I just thought I was. Mickey and I were so certain that I was that we were already disgusting baby names on our way to the hospital."

"Hope." The Doctor said softly.

"Yeah, that was my pick. Hope. How'd you know?"

"Oh, just a guess." He lied.

She looked at him for a moment, narrowing her eyes before shrugging it off.

"Okay then. But when Mickey and I got to the hospital, I turned out not to be pregnant. Of course we were happy that I wasn't, I was 17, he was too, we couldn't have handled a little baby at that point in our lives."

"That's true. Me, I was 117 when my wife and I got our fist child."

"Do Time Lords- Ladies, get pregnant?" Rose asked.

"No, children weren't made the, let's call it the 'human way'. They were created in a different way. Too complicated to explain."

"Were you 'created'?" Rose asked.

"No, I was born. My mother wasn't exactly a Time Lady. She was-," He hesitated. "She was human."

Rose was silenced for a moment. She always thought about the Doctor being 100 percent Gallifrean.

"So you're like half human?" she asked.

"Well no, only 20 percent human. Time Lord biology is dominant to the human one." He looked at Rose, who looked really confused. He could understand, she just got the news that he wasn't totally Gallifrean, and on top of that she now knew that he had been a dad and granddad and that his father had been married to a human.

"Okay," She finally said. "Interesting."

He laughed. Typical Rose, hearing pretty shocking news and just taking it in and moving on.

"Let's get back to the TARDIS then." He said after laying on the grass of New-New York for another hour or so in silence.

"Yes, let's go. I'm pretty hungry."

"Let's go for chips somewhere." He said, smiling at Rose. "I know the perfect place."

Rose opened the TARDIS' doors and stepped outside, immediately recognizing were they were.

"You-, you brought me back home?" She said, her voice almost breaking. "Does this mean you're leaving me?" Tears shot into her eyes.

"No. no, no, no, no of course not. London 2005 is just the best place to get some decent chips."

The Doctor saw the relief on Rose's face.

"You really thought I was going to drop you back on Earth? Oh Rose you silly human girl, I couldn't live on without you! I'm never going to leave you." He pulled her into a tight hug.

"I know, I just was a little confused about seeing London again."

"Do you want to leave? We can get chips elsewhere." He asked her, still holding her in his arms.

"No, it's fine, really. I'd like to have some food that won't possibly kill me." She joked.  
"Oi!" The Doctor yelled. "I'd never let you eat anything that could kill you!"

"I know, I know. You take excellent care of me." She looked up and he kissed her forehead, slipping one hand into hers.

"Let's eat!" he said.

The Doctor got to paper bags with chips at a stand. He handed one over to Rose.

"Here you go, m'ady." He said.

"Thank you, m'lord." She laughed and they started walking while eating the chips. They passed a small playground with a few swings and a slide. Rose walked towards one of the swings and sat down. The Doctor did the same with the other swing. He looked at Rose and saw the sadness in her eyes.

"What is it, Rose?" He asked.

"I remember this playground." She said. "I used to play here with Mickey when I was little. I would sit on this swing and he would sit on that one." She pointed at the swing the Doctor was currently sitting on. "Mum would sit on that bench, making sure we wouldn't wonder off."

"I'm sorry, Rose. I didn't know." The Doctor said.

"It's okay, Doctor. Really, I worked through my mum's death."

"I think you haven't, Rose. Maybe it's an idea to visit her grave?" He looked at Rose. She looked so sad and fragile. She gave a small nod and he took her hand. They stepped into a cab and the Doctor instructed the driver to go to the cemetery.

Once they arrived they walked up to Jackie's grave. It had a beautiful stone saying:

Jackie Tyler

1966-2005

Loved by many

You will never be forgotten

"I don't get this part of being human, and I get everything!" He said after a while.

Rose looked at him in confusion.

"What don't you get?"

"The fact that when your loved ones pass away, you put them in the ground. Well, that's not the confusing part. The confusing part is that you take around ten words and you smack those on a stone to define their lives. Promise me that when I die, you won't put some meaningless phrase on my stone." He said.

"We both know that I'll go before you. But if I go, can you make sure I get buried next to my mum, if that is possible?"

"Rose, don't talk like that. You've got a long and beautiful live in front of you. You will travel with me and have adventures and the only thing that will be able to kill you is old age. I won't let anything else happen to you." He said. His voice sounded serious and he looked at her with his intense brown eyes. "I promise you that, Rose."

"Thank you, Doctor." She said, giving him a sad smile. "You know you are my best friend right?"

"And you're mine." He tod her, smiling.

They gave each other a tight hug. Rose heard his heartbeats. They were slightly elevated. The Doctor gave her a kiss on top of her head.

"Let's get out of here."

They were back in the centre of London when a thought popped into Rose's head.

"Doctor, you remember about our talk about how it would be after I'm gone right?" she asked. "Well, I thought that: what if you went back to the TARDIS now, and I spend today by myself. That way, when I'm gone, you can come back to this day, of you want, to see me again."

The Doctor wanted to protest.

"Rose, I think-," But he changed his mind. "I think that is quite a good idea. Are you sure about this?"

"Yes, I'll go to the chips stand we were before again and you go back to the TARDIS for now. I'll spend the day with –maybe- a future you and you will have a day that you can spend with me after I'm gone. Just make sure you don't tell me anything about my future. Spoilers, remember?"

"Okay, I think that's the plan for now. I'll see you later, how about 12 o'clock tonight at the TARDIS?"

"Okay, see you then Doctor!" Rose turned around to go to the chips stand.

Every time the Doctor thought he knew everything there was to know about Rose, she would amaze him again with an amazing idea. He returned to the TARDIS.

Rose was standing at the chips stand when she saw a strange man standing across the street, just staring at her. She decided to walk towards him. He didn't look like her Doctor but something felt familiar abut him.

"Doctor?" she asked.

The man smiled at her and pulled her into a hug.

"Rose," He whispered.

He let her go and cupped her cheek.

"Still beautiful as the day I met you." He laughed and hugged her again.

It was a strange feeling. She knew this was her Doctor, he'd just regenerated. In his time, she would be dead.

"Let's get a cuppa tea." Rose offered.

"Splendid."

They sat across of each other in silence while sipping from their beverages. The Doctor couldn't move his gaze away from Rose. He was so glad she had come up with the idea for this day all those years ago. He had never moved on, even though he had a lot of other companions travelling with him. Donna, Martha, Amy and Rory, River and of course most recently Clara. But none of them were like Rose. He had missed Rose every day.

"I've missed you." He said to break the silence.

"How long has it been, you know- for you?" Rose asked.

"Oh, years really. Can't tell you too much though. Spoilers."

Of course, she thought.

"You haven't been travelling alone, right. You really shouldn't. You know how you get when you travel alone. There is nobody to stop you when you're about to go too far."

"No, I've had companions. But no one was like you, Rose."

Rose blushed.

"You know," He said. "I've thought about not coming back to this date. I didn't know if I could handle it. I've missed you so much and I love you so much."

"You- you love me?" Rose asked. She felt butterflies in her stomach.

"Well, yeah. But I of course haven't told you yet." He looked horrified. "Oops, I might have told you too much already."

"It's okay, I don't expect my Doctor to tell me he loves be, he probably doesn't. Yet, or something."

"Yeah, maybe. I don't know."

"You look so different. How many times have you regenerated since my- uh- passing?" She asked. He saw that she felt uncomfortable to talk about her own death.

"Oh, just once. I had to absorb some radiation from the Ma-," He stopped himself trying not to give away too many spoilers. "The radiation from a machine. It made me regenerate." He gave her a slight smile.

She smiled back. He didn't look too bad, just, different. A bit shorter, still not ginger but sort of brownish again. He had a pale skin and beautiful, clear blue eyes. He wore a suede jacket and a bowtie. Kind of ironic, because her Doctor hated bowties.

"Still crave bananas?" she asked with a grin.

"No, apples for me, and fish fingers and custard." She gave him a weird look. "It's delicious!" He shouted. "You asked for it, let's find a restaurant!"

The tie-Doctor was tinkering with the TARDIS. Rose had been gone for several hours now. Oh who was he kidding, she had been away for 3 hours, 34 minutes and 7 seconds. He guessed a future him had shown up after all. He missed her though, so he went to her room. He lied down on her bed when he felt something hard underneath her pillow. It was her diary. He had found Rose's diary. Immediately he flipped it open and began to read.

 _Dear Diary,_

 _Today the Doctor suffered from memory loss and I was so scared. He didn't remember me so at first I thought he was going to kick me off the TARDIS. Fortunately he didn't, in fact he kissed me, twice. I don't know why. Maybe because he didn't remember me he thought that, since I was travelling with him, we were together. What if he kisses all his companions? What if I'm just the same and he's going to kick me off of the TARDIS when he gets bored of me?_

Why would she think that? He loved her, he would never leave her behind. He'd told her that. Well, maybe this entry was from before he'd told her. He closed the book and wanted to put it back underneath the pillow like he found it, but changed his mind. He picked it up again and went to his bedroom. There he placed his underneath a big pile of paper on his desk in the hope she wouldn't find it. Then he went back to tinkering with the TARDIS and waiting for it to be midnight.

The bowtie-Doctor and Rose were at a restaurant. Rose laughed at him while he tried to order fish fingers and custard. He ended up ordering fish fingers with fries and a bowl of custard on the side. As soon as the food came he took a fish finger, dipped it into the custard and handed it over to Rose, only to see her scrunch up her nose in distaste.

"Now come on Rose, it's delicious! Just try it!" He said while taking one for himself. Rose gave him the benefit of the doubt and put the fish finger in her mouth.

"O my god, this is delicious!" she said with her mouth full.

"I told you so!" He laughed.

They ate some more and talked about his future companions.

"Promise me you won't tell- you know- me." The Doctor said.

"I promise." Rose laughed. "I promise to not tell you about the things you tell me tonight."

"Okay, well, there is Amy. I met her when she was just a little girl, about 8 years old. She told me her name was Amelia Pond and she was the one that gave me fish fingers with custard. At first I was so jealous of her because she was ginger. Just like Donna. Oh Donna, she was just splendid!"

Rose laughed but the Doctor detected a small hint of sadness in her face. It was to be expected, of course. He was telling her about how happy he had been after she was gone.

"Rose, you have to know that every day after you were gone, I tried to find a way to get back to you! I still am trying, just haven't succeeded yet."

"We- I- I don't die?" Rose asked.

"Well, not really. I can't tell you anything about it. Spoilers, you know."

"Yeah, of course." Rose looked at her watch, it was 11:30. "I should head back to the TARDIS, to my Doctor. I have to be back by midnight."

"Let's go then."

They walked in silence. Her hand tucked into his. They still fitted perfectly and it almost felt as if she was holding the hand of her own Doctor, which she was. He just looked different. They saw the TARDIS standing on the corner and the Doctor swallowed as he saw the tie-Doctor standing in the doorway. He stopped walking and turned to Rose.

"Don't tell him anything about tonight okay?" He said for the last time.

"Yeah, I promise."

The bowtie-Doctor looked at the TARDIS and saw the tie-Doctor moving inside again. This was his chance.

"Rose, can I - ?" He begun.

"What is it, Doctor?" She asked. She was surprised when he dove forward and kissed her. It felt different from the kisses she had shared with her Doctor, the tie-Doctor, but is still felt familiar. She kissed him back for a moment until he pulled away.

"I love you Rose." He pulled her into a hug.

"I love you too." She said, feeling tears burning in her eyes.

"Don't cry, I'm still with you, right over there." He pointed to the TARDIS.

"I know. And who knows, maybe I'll take another day like this, so you can come again." She added.

"Maybe you will, Rose. But until then, Goodbye." He let her go of his grip and walked in the other direction. Rose looked at him until he walked around the corner, waving at her for the last time. She liked the future Doctor. Not scared to show her his feelings. Probably because they had come clean to each other about their feelings. Rose walked back to the TARDIS and stepped inside.

"Hi Rose," The Doctor greeted her. "Had a nice time?"

She didn't answer and just looked at him. He looked like himself again, messy hair and pinstriped suit. She walked over to him and gave him a hug. He wrapped his arms around her and held her for a while.

"It was great, but I can't really tell you about it. Spoilers, y'know?"

"Yes, of course." He smiled at her. "You look tired, maybe you should turn in."

"Yes, I guess so." Rose walked into the corridor when her head poked around the corner. "Doctor, what do you think about bow ties?" She asked.

"Can't stand them, really. Why are you asking?"

"Oh, no reason." She laughed and went to her room. Once there she looked underneath her pillow to get her diary. She had a lot to write down but was disappointed when there was no diary to be seen. She searched her room but didn't find anything, so she went to ask the Doctor.

"Doctor? Are you in here?"

"Yes Rose, what is it?" He asked. He sounded concerned.

"Oh, nothing big, I just can't find my diary. Have you seen it?" She looked at him.

"No, I don't think I did." He lied.

"Oh, do you have any idea where it might be? I kind of have a lot to write down."

"I don't know, maybe the TARDIS nicked it?" He tried.

Rose left the console room without saying anything else and the Doctor also went to his room. When he heard Rose's bedroom door shut he lifted the pile of paper and took out the diary. He sat down on his bed and flipped it open. He skipped the parts about the adventures they'd had because he was there too, when his eye caught something.

 _Dear diary,_

 _I just can't get that song out of my head! Mum always told me about the time she got it stuck in her head. That was when she knew that my dad was the man she wanted to marry. And when granny got it stuck in hers about two months before gramps asked her to marry him. If I were superstitious I would think that the Doctor is going to ask me to marry him soon._

What! He wasn't going to propose to Rose. He loved her, sure. But marriage? He wasn't the domestic type of guy and she knew that. He decided to read along.

 _But of course he isn't, I'm not a stupid ape. He's not the domestic type of guy. I know he loves me, but not in a romantic way, more in a best friends-way. And that is okay. I can live with that._

Thank god she wasn't expecting him to propose, or to even share his feelings with her. She knew. Well, she knew about half of his feelings for her. He didn't just lover her as a friend, or a best friend. He loved her so much more, and also in a romantic way.

All of the sudden he felt guilty about reading her diary so he put it down. Tomorrow he would put it back in her room and to make up for it, he would leave his diary in the library, on Rose's spot. 'Yes, good plan.' He thought to himself. She can decide if she wants to read it.

The next day, while Rose took a shower, he sneaked into her room. He placed her diary back under her pillow and left his on the couch in the library. Then he quickly headed for the console room to pretend to tinker with the TARDIS. Rose stepped into the console room.

"Busy?" she asked.

"Just tinkering." He said. "Had a nice shower?"

"Yeah, it was fine. I'm just going to the library, are you coming with?" She pointed in the direction of the corridor.

"No, I'll just be here if you need me."

"Okay." Rose went for the library. Once there she wanted to sit in her spot on the couch when her eye caught the sight of a book. It looked like her diary, but it was TARDIS-blue and had a strange symbol on the front. She flipped open the cover and read what it said: ' **This journal belongs to the Doctor.'**

So the Doctor had a diary. She headed back to the console room.

"Doctor? She yelled. "Are you still in there?"

"Yes, I'm here. What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I found your journal on the couch. Where do you want me to put it?" She asked.

"Oh, just put it on my bed, thank you."

Rose walked back into the corridor and the Doctor sighed. Now he felt even more guilty about reading Rose's diary. She was so honest and it took her about three seconds to tell him she'd found his journal. She didn't even feel the temptation to open it up.

The temptation to read his journal was big but Rose couldn't. The Doctor trusted her, and she wouldn't do anything to break his trust otherwise it was back to Earth for her. She stood in the doorway to the Doctor's room. She'd never been in here before. The room was beautiful. Hardwood floor and creme walls. Wooden plinths rose from the floor to about one-third up the wall. There was a balcony but Rose figured it wasn't real. The view was beautiful. Big mountains with snow. Standing against the wall was a big desk, covered with papers with weird markings on them. Probably Gallifrean. Rose thought, since the TARDIS didn't translate it. On the other side was a big bed, neatly made. Rose put down the journal on the desk and left the room.


End file.
